Tuesday, March 20, 2018

Hope

It is difficult when writing a blog on adoption and family to remember that these kids need their privacy too. At least for a while as we work out some difficult behaviors and learn to be a family. And, so, the things that I some times feel like I should be writing about need to stay quiet and intimate just within our walls for now. However, today I was asked the question what does gift of adoption mean to you. And the answers came surprisingly quickly.

The gift of adoption really means the gift of hope. And hope gives us a reason to live. There are moments when this just seems too hard...this adoption, this parenting, this culture change, this trauma. But, then we take a deep breath or 20 and remember that we have hope that one day these children will be successful. There is hope that they will be healthy. There is hope that they will give back to others. There is hope that they can find comfort in their sorrows. There is hope that our family can bring healing to one another.

Just a couple of days ago we were picking up Addison, our five year old, from preschool. While I was inside signing her out, Gifty and Kai were devising a song. When we got back in the car, they counted to three and began singing a love song to her. The lyrics were a simple, "A-ddi, we love you," but the there was clapping, seat dancing, and rhythm and volume changes. Shiloh loved the song and laughed the biggest belly laugh that two year olds can laugh. Every time they stopped for a breath, Shiloh would count one-two-three and they would start over. Then they started signing it for every member of the family in turn..."Shi-loh, we love you...Mom-my, we love you...Dad-dy, we love you...Kum-ba, we love you." I can still hear the rhythmic chant in my mind or as they say in their heart. They sang for probably 20 minutes with everyone full of love, joy, acceptance, and freedom. In this moment, I breathed in fresh healthy air and exhaled all the toxins knowing that this adoption will be a power for hope in all of our lives.

Here are other glimmers of hope:
Kai brought home a paper about mom being his hero because I help him when he is hurt.
Gifty loves to stay in the bath until her toes get wrinkly because she has never seen that before.
Kumba kisses me on the shoulder when she doesn't think I'm watching.
Addison wraps her legs over Gifty's when we are watching a show.
Shiloh gets pushed around in her tricycle by Kai.
Kumba changes Shiloh's soiled pants while she is potty training.
Gifty gives up her apple to Addi because it is the last one.
Kai does a chore for Gifty so that she can relax.
Gifty brushes and puts Addison's hair in a bun each morning before school.
Kumba "reads" Shiloh books.
Kai and Gifty are constantly laughing at Dad's dinner time jokes.
They love broccoli, peas, and carrots...never having a vegetable before in their life!

When all things feel lost, I remember that God gives us hope and hope heals.